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Episode · 2 years ago

Raising Your Virtual Leadership Game with Neuroscience Hacks

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

How can leaders get better at their Virtual Leadership using Neuroscience hacks? Live interview with Roberto Bendana of Leadership Link

Hello everybody, welcome to episode four of leadership link, so live stream video interview podcast, where we talked about leadership and how to reconceptualize it through the words and eyes of different practitioners, coaches, experts, leaders and people who develop leaders today we have one of those people now. An another important note. Number One, the person We're speaking with is on the other side of the world, Singapore, so shoutout to Singapore. Number two, this is the first show in English. We've done four previous episodes in Espanol. So I'm really proud because I prefer English. That's basically why now, so really happy about that. So who's with us today? Today we have Dr John Kenworthy, creator of Leadership Advance Edge neuros neuroscience based leadership coaching and training in effective tech enabled learning environments. That's a hand that's a mouthful, but he's going to explain what that means specifically right now. And, aside from having him from all the way on the other side of the world, very happy about that. He's a great person and he'll tell us a little a bit about his background. A lot of energy. Seems to be a very positive and happy person. So it's I'm glad to have them on today. Now, what are we going to be talking about? What's the topic? Well, the topic for today is neuroscience hacks to help you raise your virtual leadership game. Right we're going to be talking about that. He's going to explain a little bit about those hacks, those brain hacks, and how they can raise your game in the virtual leadership world right now. So, without further ado, let me do some stuff here. There we go, here we go. Hello, Dr John Kenworthy. All right, repet so how are you? I'm good, I'm good, perfect. Greetings from seeing a pool. We all on the other because he's mentioned, on the other side of the world, so we can meet virtually and all around the world simultaneously at the same time. Completely Marvelous. We love it. We're exactly completely marvelous. Yeah, I love this. And you know, right now it's ten...

PM central daylight, take savings time, and over there it's am right here in the morning. That's rights eleven o'clock in the morning for us. So all right, thank you, just setting up so late. Oh, you're welcome. I'm delighted. And you've got your coffee and I've got my sleeping pills. So, yeah, we're ready. Yeah, that's right, joke. I'm joking. So today we have this topic right. When I asked you what would be the best thing about leadership you could talk about, you focused on this. Now, of course, this must be relevant with the introduction I made about you tell us about leadership advantage and the play on the leadership and leadership advantage, the eddedge at the end, as opposed to age, as normal is, is our learning and development process, which is to encourage people to get outside their comfort zone. We develop them, we guide them through coaching and we empower them with the templates, with the acts, with the ways of being able to do this in the real world. So the advantage is it's being able to take something that you are learning about leadership, not just learning how to be a leader, but very much how can you do leadership on one are the things that you can do to lift your leadership game very easily, very quickly, tomorrow, as soon as as soon as you put this into practice. It's all about putting it into practice, of course, and and tell us a little bit about effective tech enabled learning environments. I'm curious about that point. I've been using technology to help learning for very many years. I go back to bulletin board systems, using those in order to teacher. The time it was prisoners and being able to run teaching events as they were in those days, but asynchronously with with bulletin boards, very much like a chat system is now. It's it hasn't right and developed that much, but what I did find was that, and I'm particularly more recently, as as everybody has gone online, all the teachers, trainers, schools have gone online when they've resisted for so very many years in spite of having the technology to be able to do it. The tech enabled environment can be misused very easily. There's far too much talking head going on, which is boring, and when you see a lot of the teaching and training that is going on, it tends to be that very talking head lecture style. Yet it happens that what we cannot really do is take what we were doing in the real world, in the light world, put in person and just transplanted by stick in video camera in front of the starch. That's not using the technology as well. This is technology that appears to do the same thing as we can do in person. We can actually make it better than most people unfortunately make it worse. Okay, so it's not just about throwing a camera on there and be like, nope, we're doing, you know, video distance learning just because there's a camera on. Right. There's a lot more everything, yes, out now that we can have cameras, people putting cameras on and don't only two or three years ago very few people were using the camera. Everyone was doing audio or simply a synchronous chat email type of things. We can actually do a lot more. But just because the tech is there, it's available, does not need to say it's a good way of starting and developing. Of course, now that that's based on on what you're doing at leadership advant edge, right, advance edge as like the edge, so getting that advantage and the edge. So I understand that.

Now, going back, you know that in reference to what we're going to talk about, moving to today's topic, neuroscience, Hax to help you raise your virtual leadership game. So what we're going to do is, it's very straightforward. I'm going to start asking a couple questions about this and I'm curious to know. And again, so basically, very very logical, because that's my brain. Very logical. How can we use neuroscience to become better leaders? Very broad you can go ahead and start that. It's fairly huge, huge area. But and I when I think about that, it's list out with a couple of basics about neuroscience that we now understand, or we understand better, about the way our brain works. And if we imagined, our brain is really in two parts to keep arts, the basic survival mechanism, which is in the brain stem, and what is called the limbic brain or the middle brain, where your emotions happen and and things like. You know you breathe, you're breathing from the day you are born. Nobody has to think about their breathing because it's all controlled by the brain. But is what what Christine Comfort called the critter brain. I love using this as pretty brain. Some people call it the Lizard Brain, but it's the older part of our brains in terms of evolution, if you're into evolution, but looking at the basic functionality of life. But it's incredibly important. And on top of that where we've got laid the newer neo cortex or again what Christine Comfort caused the smart brain. So if we think it has been two parts. We've got our critter brain and we got our smart brain. And one of the big problems about leadership, for example, a couple of big problems in developing leadership. Change is difficult. Now, if we take the very simple thing, if you just cross your arms and where you normally cross your art and you've sit there, you're very comfortable. They're right, but actually I'm doing it the other way around it it's very incle. If you do it the other way around, you change and it becomes there. You sit there for a little while, it becomes very strange and before long you will revert to the way that they are. Come, yeah, go for so any even something as simple as that, because you can feel it now. That's information coming from your critibray. So that's all your nerve endings telling you there is something just not comfortable, that any change is uncomfortable. So teachers, trainers, coaches, they have to make a safe place for us to learn. So a school is meant to be a safe place for the children to learn, protected from the outside world. In that class room. When I'm in front of the computer, it's got to be a safe place and preferably without too many distractions. Now you can have all sorts of things going on, but what you'll see if you've got people on videos that they're dis disrupted by a message that comes in over there, something moving on their screen, over here, things happening outside, noise happening and so on. So our job as leaders, particularly in tech environment, is to make sure the place is safe for us to learn, because the change is hard and we need that safe place to practice and see if we can do it. And the second thing is, once we've we've trained people, even if we've kept a safe place, the world is not a safe place. So I go outside and the pressure is on. In real life. I've learned this wonderful new way of thinking through my leadership and stopping and making sure that I plan every think. But then my boss screams at me and says why I'm new done this yet? So I react and again, what is happening is all the inside...

...the brain. It's the way we function normally, and I call it but about eating less and eating more tea. So eat is eat, emotions, action, think, because typically, if something is happening, my emotions have already responded, they've been on alert, they're watching for all, a bird flute pass. WAS THAT SAFE? If it didn't feel safe? My adrenaline, my court is old. It's already running through my body. Right then, I've I've already acted, I've already moved. So if something frames you, your will step back. Your smiling, you may not, even though you smiled. You're your looks at your look contemptuous. All of that has happened because the critter brain has has the controls unconscious. Right then, and only after that has happened do we start thinking. Now that that poses a bit of a problem, because if my boss shouts at me, I get defensive. If I'm scared or I am I've done something wrong, I get again, I get defensive, I'm fearful, and that changes my behavior. Then I think about it. Yeah, I shouldn't be scared of this, I shouldn't be worried about that. Why am I worried? And then I can think, control my emotions and act accordingly. So what we want to do is get ourselves to switch. The eating is going to happen, our emotions are going to be good. Actions are going to follow the emotions. We can't stop that because it happens in Split seconds. Right, I'm very good previously on the thinking fast and slow. Yes, it is to two processes, the front of being on the school, but the slower brain is is the one that thinks. Is a basically smart yes, think that that. That's an amazing book, by the way. I would recommend it. Right's show and and, but be beyond that. Now, when I hear those things, there's so many authors that come up that have talked something about what that is. For example, I'm a big fan of Robert Fritz, structural emics. Huge bet him. He's not so neural science, he's he's more about again, but again the structure we have, which is the brain structure, determines eat, emotion, acted. Right, but what is? It is beautiful framework to understand also how to change, because there is volition, which is your will to actually do what. Understand that it's eat. That at first, emotions, action and that and the tea is think a eat is emotion, action and think and think. Think. Okay, so it's emotion, action and think, exactly and thinking. So it's at the third. It's it's number three in that in that order, right, and we we think that thinking is first, but it's not. So, yeah, aside from that, from my question, from my question, how can we use neuroscience to become better leaders? is by understanding the structures of the brain and finding ways, which are the word Hack right, that we use, to to apply it so that we can get we can kind of get around those kinds of things. That's right. That's right. So understanding neurosciences, he's tremendous. It's it's part in neuroscience, past psychology that the boundaries are really shifting at the moment. But we're learning more and more that this is the way we have been created. So this is the way our brains work. Understanding that is one thing. Now what do we do about that? Right and at the moment, Elon Musk has not, you know, invented or created the neural plant, the neural neural links that is going to do this. We're going to allow computers to decide for us at the moment.

We've got to decide that we need to do something about. You brought up neural link. I'm now I'm going to have to ask you about your opinion on that. What do you think about neuraling? Do you want a computer deciding what you do know of course, as they don't. There you go, then we we've got a big enough problem with smartphones of the moment that one of the great things about going out at the moment in Singapole we are allowed to go back and and a dating restaurants and cafes and what is beautiful to see is that people are there. Is the only place where you can tell you your face mask off and talk to somebody friend. So it's beautiful at the moment because people are taking the masks off and talking to friends, which they haven't been doing for many years. Previously they were in the same restaurant but they weren't talking, they were texting. So if you have a computer doing that, then everything that's going on inside of inside of your brain is he's going to be dictated by a computer. We're not good at selfdiscipline as it is as human beings. If we allow our computer to take over and do it, who have we given authority to control our lives? And suddenly, you know, not sure that Elon Musk is the person I want in charge of my brain. Every more. You to buy some some Tesla stuff. So back is like by teslasy right away. But by how can we use neurosize to become betterly is I think so. It's about understanding the brain and at using that information to make it actionable in our lives. Very you know, very like, step by step, what to do so that we can take advantage. Talk about advantage of that information, doing to to go around these circuitriies, these things, and and and to use them to our advantage. Of course, now I'm understanding a lot because I see, there you go. But all right, so now it takes me to the next question. What do a neuroscience brain hack? Okay, KS of work around. I mean hacking traditionally is chopping roughly, which in a sense we are, because the way our brain works, we're we're forging new pathways for many things in doing things. But a hack is it work around. It's a way of I don't I use the word tricking your brain, sometimes tricking yourself, because your normal thinking, as we mentioned, emotion, action. Think what we're trying to do is make sure the thinking is happening, and I'm that's when we use hacks, because hacks are are very simple workaround. But when I use the word simple, it's not always easy to do. It can be quite hard for some people because they've they used to doing things in another way. But what we have is a simple work around that you can do and, as you know, one of the great example of a very simple hack that everybody can do is my advantage. Hack number two is the second most powerful hack that we teach our clients and were teaching very, very quickly, very very early on, and I can do this right now with everybody. All you have to do is pause. You pause, you breathe, you think, and one of the powerful things this is a lot of people will call this being mindful. A lot of people will meditate...

...like this, but it's just you've been asked a question. Pause and the power of the pause is astounding. As soon as you stop yourself just a moment, instead of interrupting the person who speaking, you appear to be listening. Hopefully you are listening because you're thinking about what are you listening for? You're not just letting the self talk, interrupt everything that's going on, because otherwise somebody else is speaking and you'll get ye, are want to make this one and you interrupt. On other occasions it could be somebody's trying to tell you how to do something. Oh, I know the whole ready. You know. I don't need that. No, no, that's I don't need that information. I already know, but perhaps I've got a different way of doing it. So just stop from that brief moment and allow that happened. Whether it's a a simple pause, that gives a little bit of silence. Plus the other thing about pausing is it allows the other purse to process, because we're seeing thing, we're trying to make sense. So you just stop for a moment and then continued, but it gives your brain, you're thinking brain up here, than NEO cortext chance to catch up. You can understand in that moment of breathing deeply, get some oxygen, reduced courses or reduced stress, and suddenly you're back in chance that the thinking in the smart brain is back in charge, and that's possibly the most important thing people can learn right right from the distraction distinct you'd made of the critter brain in the smart brain and and from my understanding, what you're saying is that neuroscience has discovered that that if you're not taking this pause or using these hacks, the critter brain, meaning emotion action, is kind of a first place all the time. That so we're always reacting two things. Is Okay, and and there are many people who live their lives based on the Chrit to brain. They're not thinking. They're not thinking like rational, decent, moral human beings. They behaving as if they're animals. And we see it. We say it all the time. We see in riots, we see it's in bluting. It's give me more, give me more, take more, take and that's what's happening right. And the power of pause, to how still pausing for a second, astounding power of the pools. Then he's not good idea. Stop, just don't do it right. That will be fantastic if people would do the right and it's something so simple and turning that into a habit right, that into a habit is, you know, could be, could be, and I'm sure it is powerful. And at some point in the interview I'll ask you to give me some insight on what what you've seen in regards to your clients and how this is work for them. But before we get to that point, I think so number one, a neuroscience brain hack is that it's kind of like chopping through that in a way and getting the point being very practical and again, very easy things that you can do today, and actually I'm taking that for this conversation and I'm going to start applying it now. Excellent, of course. As as a coach, sometimes I make questions and then there's like a thirty two, sometimes even a sixty two pause and when I'm not seeing the person, is just silence. When I've seen...

...the person, the person's thinking. So those are those questions that elicit. That's why coaching, I think, is also very powerful, is it engages the thinking brain or the smart break way and you get the person to reflect, because that's the part of our brain. Smart Brain, is the one that reflects on things that are happening to make decisions right. Absolutely, Yes, okay, okay, and we have a comment here. Let's see it. Says He Yehan Lynn do oh. There you go. Hi, John, thanks for the nuggets pause before responding. There you go. Thank you. Thank you, Yekan Lin, for that. And going back to these questions. I don't know if you is there anything else you want to say about what is a neuroscience brain hack before we move on to the next question. I think that gives you a good idea that they want to be simple, if possible, very straightforward and well, well, you tend to find is what I do, is I lay of them. So, once you've got the secret power of the pools, well, we can use that and exactly as you mentioned, with questions, and I think you'll speaking with bold in a few days time, leading with questions. The power of questions does exactly what you say. Just stops people in their tracks for the moment and go think of the answer. Right, they can said brain and then there might be a better way of doing this, and that's what we want to be able to do. So asking great questions is in many ways a hack. It's an interrupt for the normal way of being. Yeah, and I also it brings to mind so many thinkers and modern day authors. You know, Joea spends all the stuff he's talking about about being present. It all has to do with this. Everybody frames it from a different perspective, some from a more spiritual perspective, others from a more scientific, neuroscientific perspective, but it's all really the same. It's as humans being aware that we're aware and understanding the circuitry and, like you said, the way we're built and how? Yes, as conscious beings, we can override that because we have the magic of free will. Right, exactly. And I think when? When do you know? You look at some of the spiritual things, the mindfulness that psychology. A lot of people, particularly you know, the engineers, the scientists, soft and fluffy, I do, and well, business people, they liked in to to softly, softly. Yeah, see sign. Yeah, there's all back both lines. Originally it's the way we were created. So that's the way our brain works. We're learning about it because we know, honestly, we know almost nothing about this vastly complex thing up here. Right, right, yeah, he problems it into a scientific perspective that people can say it's chemistry. Yep, it's chemistry. Yeah, I should have listened to my teacher and say, I don't know, in high scores, I'm I don't know. There's through later as useful. Yeah, or square roots wall's useful, but we know they didn't, unfortunately, give us a practical use for it. Right, and there's a lot of marketing around it as well. There's I mean I think there's a lot of I think manipulation of information. I don't want that sounds bad, but that's what marketing is, manipulating information ideas to get outcomes and I think the way things are framed. But really they're all saying the same things. Are all seeing...

...the same tune on a different key. Okay, it's song, just a different key, different same kind of structure, which is what we're saying that it's all about out you know, understanding that we that free will, that volition, can lead us to direct our lives. You know, we self leadership, so many different topics. But getting to the next question, if that's okay, is how would you define? Now I want to know about virtual leadership game and how you define this, because it's part of the the title. How would you want this virtual leadership game? The virtual leadership game? Well, it's the is the world we're in at the moment where, at the moment we've all been forced to work from home and run our businesses from home, to lead our team from home, unless you're in essential services, but even then, if you if you're able to work from homeland, people need to be doing that. So for Health Sake, right. So what we've been pushed into this world. The technology is around and the timing of covid really couldn't have been much better to have come once we've got all of these platforms available, the bit ability to use video so easily, everybody has got a smartphone in their pockets where everybody can join in. It's practically free to do this because the infrastructure is already been in place for many years. So a lot of these things are there, but we haven't been doing a lot of remote leadership, and this is where it's where it's begun to change, because the virtual world is very different. It looks very similar, but it is different. And this is a highly competitive world right now. There was so many people losing jobs, peep businesses going out because there's not enough trade going through. The the travel businesses, well, it's crippled. That's kindly airlines. where I live we have a lot of maintenance for airlines going on here. Very little of that right now because, well, the planes aren't flying, so they don't need maintenance in quite the same way. Now. How do you how do you win in this very competitive, fractured and broken world? And we do need to win. Everybody needs to win. Everybody wants to win, but there are going to be winners and losers. So how do you do that and how, as a leader, how do I inspire my team from a distance right how do I motivate them? What do I what do I need to do? How do I challenge them right now? How do I lift them up? How do I encourage them and engage them, and how do I direct them? How do I elevate them? How do I edify them and myself? Because, well, none of us were expecting this to go on this lot. Hey, it's tire, it's honestly, it's getting boring because we're seeing the name thing. How do we do this? And and we mentioned earlier, you said before we came on air, about you know, our kids are at home. We're working with our kids now. For me that's great because I've been doing this for many years. I set up a Home Office after start in two thousand and three and I think you get used to it. But I've been speaking with many of my clients, my coaching clients, and well, you know, their marriage is taking a toll on this because they when they got together, they one of them was traveling a lot. They were particularly here in Singapore, that they travel a great deal because with such a tiny place, but at least we're going to the office every day and they saw other people the stories to tell about what the other partner, partner, hadn't seen.

But now you're together two seven that's tough. You know you love this person, but WHOA, it gets a little bit tiring and you've got to be able to set the boundaries. And I've been doing some research with people and that's where you've been reading and watching as being what are people been finding? What are they're concerned? What's happening to them? And they've all mentioned this at they're they're struggling to motivate themselves to keep on keeping on for the resilience. And then that's just me, while I've also got a I'm a leader and everybody I believe as a leader, but I've got to encouraged my my colleagues because they feeling down, trickling and I don't know. You know at the moment. You know, I know you have a baby, but that's all I know. You can hear the baby, but that's it's also interesting the insight of people have again one of my clients were saying he doesn't like having the video one, but he turns the video on when his daughters behind and she's playing peekaboo and it's why do you put the video on? Well, because they want to see you, they want people. We knows it. We want to see what your homes like, we want to see your kids, we want to see your dog, because we're missing that social element right, and that whole world has changed. Yes, social interaction. We've got too much with how immediate families right, nothing like enough to go outside. And and when they do open here, what happens when they open the pubs in England? Everybody goes to the pub because they've missed going to the PUB. And then, unfortunately, they're going to spread the virus around because they haven't learned the act of wearing masks and they're haven't worked out that actually, this is a health thing. It's not a rights issue. So they only say, well, I need to get out. Well, honestly, we completely understand. You'll need to get out. The longer we can all suck this up, and this is global for the first time ever. This is something that's globe. But if we all suck it up to long enough, this virus is going nowhere. So, yeah, we do that, we can open up the economy for the world again, because we kind of liked that. We were enjoying the benefits over in Mexico. You were enjoying the benefits of, you know, World Trade, free trade across borders. Right, China was loving the free trade and you know, but they sucked it up, they shut everything down under very serious lockdown conditions and they're out. They don't have the problem anymore. And Everyone said, weld the you know, that's that's the leadership. But yes, when you don't have to go for a vote, that's okay, you can do this sort does the right right. And so for the interruption. That leads. It's a great segue because you were kind of leading into the next question. I think you've been touched upon what you know answering this question. How are leaders currently playing the virtual leadership game? And I think you're already saying a little bit about that. You continue to elaborate. How are they performing under these circumstances? Leaders? Well, not so, not so well. Let me talk about the biggest, one of the biggest issues about the virtual world and what it is is there is no empathy online, or very little empathy. Normally, my am see the emotions of am getting, if you know, if I want to sense of you and your happiness or your understanding of what I'm saying at the moment. I Yes, I've got a video and you cannot. But what you'll notice is that the reason I appreciate we're going halfway around the world and back everywhere else, but there is a delay in what we're doing right. There is a very slight delay between the video and the voice and...

...your unconscious brain is looking for the signals, the smile and not yeah, yeah, and then then, of course, what's happening. And we're very blessed we've got a very, very good connection. You could go bro and stuck in that moment, or you're talking and nobody's here. You. Yeah, that's stressful for the brain. That must be the gritter brain must go crazy. It's like, Oh my God, I'm saying I'm safe right, I'm saying situation and training of exactly doing that. So I'm one of our biggest things is these things, these two things here, these little hands. We don't realize how much we really on watching the hands, the gestures and seeing that my hand does not have a weapon. See if I were meeting you face to face in person. In a normal sick situation, we would have met wherever we meet, and I would have come towards you with an open, open palm, ready to shed your hand, and we would have shaken hands if we would have touched. All that touch. Now I don't have to love you to get a little oxytocin boost my brain right. Good. Say, Oh, yeah, I like. Of course, we like. We did. That's how I build a connection, my trust, my liking of a person. Yeah, they're down to it. In my Mary, we're man would oxyte and that's that's not happening. I'm not getting the oxytocin because the I don't see the micro expressions now. Their flicker too much. And and this is whatever. Thirty frames per second? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's it's slower than our brain, but it's fast enough to trick our brain. So it's a hack. It's no more than that. And what what's happening is our mirror neurons, and mirror neurons are are how I process what you may be feeling right now. So I'd literally go into the whole thing of how is he looking, and then how would that make me feel? And that gives me an indication and saying okay, he's paying attention, he is listing, or nose board, he's gone off or is upset, whatever it is. I get that and I can adjust. But in the virtual world I can't. There is no the mirror neurons really aren't working at all. Well, right, plus their small detail of the size of your head right now, your head is actually tiny. It's about saving but it's also three feet away from it to two and a half, three feet away, but me to listen. Well, hey should speak. It should be much, much bigger today. What we don't realize, because my conscious brain were it's a video. But what we need is and TV is work work this out. So when you watch a TV program what they do is that they create the set, they dress the set. So they do things like put pictures behind you now, or a Sofa, if you watch friends. And what that enables me to do is I can now adjust my my brain can adjust as oh, yeah, that their proper size. What they're doing right? If all I see the head and the torso and miss seeing everything that's happening down here. Right, you know, you can't see hands anymore. You can't. You know tell really what what I'm doing with my arms, right, except maybe I'm assembling a weapon that I'm about to stab you with. But that's right. It sounds crazy, but but that's the unconscious part of the brain, not the smart brains. That's better brain,...

...right, is the critter brain. And the ritzy brand is asking free questions all the time. Am I safe, do I belong and do I matter? That's all is asking, and they ask these questions every minute, all every single day. It's constantly going, am I safe? Do I belong? Do I'm attain and as soon as it gets it, am I safe? Not Sure? I okay, no, not sure. And what's instantly happened? Even as I thought about that and using as people listen to me, say that there adrenaline, that cult is old. Level just went up a bit. And that's where we are. where, when we're online, how brains are in a constant, continuous state of low level stress. This is not good for us. He is killing us. Yes, yes, an important those are too high or adrenaline levels was too high. So at the end of the day, people are feeling very antsy. Well, what we call very answer and these things are causing as problems. Is that why? So sorry, because this is very interesting for me. I'm learning a lot. I apologize for interruption. I'm curious. Is that why there are so many problems with with insomnia, since the since the whole thing started, because I did read some research that insomnia is over the room. I mean not INSOMNI and itself, but it looks like insomnia right. It tastes like and or not being able to go to sleep even after they we work for twelve hours and if that is that because basically the cortisol is high, the brainways grown, is still high and it takes a long time. Now what, honestly, if anybody watching as got that, they need to get out and exercise, because it's the only thing that you can do that will deliberately go and begin to control that. So just get out and exercise. Pushes a little too far. Genuinely exhaust yourself, because what's happened whilst your unconscious is doing this, is working, working, work in burning energy. You are exhausted, you are completely tired out, and particularly the people are doing, you know, eight, ten, twelve hours of back to back video calls. Well, their brain is just FRY. But you have to take breaks, you must stop, turn the video off, switch off, switch off all screens, not just you know, go from big screens, little screens, middle screens, back screw big screen, no switch off. If you need to go and if you need to do something, go and read a book, Chaine the format completely. But best you thing you can do. Get Out, do some stretches, exercise, tie yourself out physically. Right, right, of course, of course, all breathe there. If you're not allowed out, then do exercise in your room, wherever you are. Push yourself to the limit, because you know it's not it's a good opportunity to do right. When you write your desk, stand at your desk wherever you possibly can. So if you can't get a standing desk, build it up so that you can do it. Put your camera at eye level so that you can look at the camera right, all of these things. He's a piece that we are chairing. Yeah, yeah, because what I knowed. That what the thing about as well. Want to share something in zoom meetings, either I look at the camera or look at you, and that's also a little troubling and stressful, because I'm looking at a camera. I'm not looking at your face and it's very stressful for me. I want to look at your face because if I look at your face, you'll see me looking down. You See. So there's really no eye contact. It's me having eye contact with a cold camera, and that I didn't realize before this meeting. That really stresses me out because there's human it's a it's a lens. It's terrible. So I'm not safe and I don't belong because...

...this lens is not of my species. Right. So what's the third one? So I'm not safe because I'm stressed out. I don't belong because this is a camera. For that point you don't really care whether you match or not, because those two levels of the beginning, they just keep going in a loop. So do I math made and get it. May Not get to look, but to do on mats or is is what I'm doing useful? Am I? Am I fulfilling my purpose on this planet? RM, no, Ha, am. I'm worth it. And and the worthiness is is the thing that causes a lot of people a lot of problems, particularly young people at the moment, because I see they don't know what they want to do, because they don't know their purpose. They haven't thought about it. Nobody's taught them this, while they have taught them that they weren't listening and they weren't listening because the talking head video on Youtube, I'm sorry, was too boring. So we need to be able to do when, not trained actors, but we readers were in business. But if you were an actor, I you could show your emotions very, very you could use your face much more effectively, you would exaggerate and and that's what we need to be able to do as leaders. He's learned how to exaggerate, learned that this, this thing, has has a has a frame around it, but use the space in order to do it. But also what you get is, you know, and you can tell I've got a green screen background here. If I do that and it starts to flicker and peep, then your brain starts going into loops as to Oh, what's happened at that move is what would yeah, what is that background? Not Real? Is this? Oh, this is the matrix. So what we're going back? I mean no, this is amazing. This is amazing because when I when I when you were going to talk about this, I didn't know that. How, how other than terrible because this is not the good news, but it's still amazing. It's still amazing to understand that this is really happening. But again, like we're backtrack to the beginning of this conversation. We can use the information about the brain to go have a work around, right, which is all this happens. We will work around the problem. This is not ideal technology. If if all of this had to be invented and created after covid maybe people will come up with something completely different. So there's a lot of work going into three dimensional virtual world. But you know, I did a lot of research on virtual worlds and it flips the brain even more than this stuff does. And if you've never been in a virtual world, just go to the nearest theme park when they're reopened, and go into them and know what happens to your guts, to your brain, everything, because, well, it's his madness and your brain doesn't doesn't like it, because we would designed for the real world, not for this one. But right, can do about it? Not even it can be more effective. There is no way you and I would be meeting in person. Try Toy, if one of US had had to fly around the world. Just no way. So there are things that we can do and we should be able to reach out, because it's just understand. This is what is happening. Empathy has flat line. We need to compensate for it exactly, and now where we we can do something about it. I just wanted it. I wanted to get to this point quickly. It's kind of a broad question, but I'm going to focus it. It says, how can braaink hacking help leaders become masters at this virtual leadership game that they're not playing very well at, you know,...

...being very good at now. Just you, can you give me two tips that a leader who watches this now or later can start applying now so that they can, you know, level up right now in this situation? Can I give you three tips? And here you give and they're tied in together. So it is one thing. So empathy is flat locked. So we need to give it some CPL okay, and remark. Remember, the mirror neurons aren't working. So our body language, we're missing a lot of it. We can we can make up if we train as actors, we can do some of it, but the nuances, the subtle signs, are unconscious. Is Very, very good at doing fantastic. Plus, this video delay, but there's ambiguity. So if I ask you to do something, there is ambiguity because I can't tell whether you're serious or not. Are you serious about that? This question? Did you really want? Three tips? And I don't have enough direction. I'm not clear, I'm not crystal clear. Plus, and I think we mentioned it before, with it, the lack of purpose. Why? Why? Why? Why am I doing? Why am I working twolve hours a day? So this uncertainty? So we compensate and we can do it with CPR. CPR STANDS FOR CLARITY. It's what what do you want me to do? Boss? Specifically, can we stop messing about and going? They give me a powerpoint deck for the pitch on Friday. That really doesn't tell me what you want, really. Yeah, the five slides to sell this product that they're going to sign on a contract for x million dollars Friday afternoon, three o'clock. That's much more specific. Right. Okay, exactly what do you want? Yeah, you've got your company standard. Be Precise. Have clarity. Second thing P is purpose. Why, if people haven't watched Simon Senex Ted talk on start with. Why? Yeah, go all this one go and watch that. You need it. You need to start with why, why we are doing things. You want to know your own purpose. But the purpose for the organization. Yes, it's to make profit, its sustainability. What's in it for me? What's so remember it's purpose for the company, purpose, for Your Business, purpose for the other person. Right, exactly, and to be honest with many leaders, purpose for you, because I don't think many people, many leaders, really know their own purpose, what we on the planet for. I let me give you, give everybody who doesn't know their own purpose at the moment of very quick another hack for you, and I'll tell it's not about you. So that saved you a couple of days work. Not About you. It's always about other people. It's to do some things for the people. Yes, serving. Now, whether it's serving, whether it's delivering, whatever it is, it's for other people. So just remember that bit. The third thing, so we had clarity. We've got purpose. Are is for responsibility. Tell me who is responsible? Now, when you're giving it to a team, it's one individual, one person is responsible for that team delivering. You only want to make sure, and you name them. Be Very clear about this. When do you want it. And again, don't don't be vague. Three o'clock on Friday, right, it's not going to be three o'clock Singapore time, Friday, October whatever. The October is six two thousand and twenty be precise. And he said it was being very antic, but you've lost all the nuances, you've lost all the subtleties...

...of your normal conversation. Yeah, so the people aren't getting the emotion, they're not getting enough empathy. We have to compensate for it, and this won't harm you. If you do this in real life in person, in person meetings, it will help, because most leaders have to think of this first. Then they can ask and then team will will know what they do. So CPR, charity, purpose responsibility. Beautiful, beautiful, I love it. So we have eat. So let's get back to kind of a review. Eight is, sorry, it's emotion, it's action and thinking. is so right of thinking. And CPR is clarity, purpose and responsibility. Right. So clarity is being specific, make clear how the purpose of the leader, the organization and the client and all the stakeholders are aligned. And Responsibility. Who is account absolutely, Yes, perfect. So going into the next one, what results have you witnessed with your clients applying eat and CPR and other hacks and the polls, the pools, is probably the thing that shocks people the most. Every client that does it, they are completely gopes back to how powerful it is. That what what happened hands when you use the pause, they stopped. They think from home, they breathe. She's very important. You know. You think you're breathing well, but we're not. We need to breathe in our deep in our belly, get some oxygen. Your brain needs the oxygen po pairing a lot through. So when they pause they get better results. Instead of being belligerent in a meeting and and forcing their viewpoint, the stop a moment. What that tells everybody else is I'm listening to you, I'm listening to your point of view. Yeah, okay, and you know, odd and and all the time, just all you've done is put your smart brain in gear. Yeah, that that brain has gone. So now the smart brain, smart brain, I want. I want to be thinking about this, because then I can answer and say I've considered that. Now you're wrong, but I can say it in a better way. So before I say no, you're wrong, pause. That's a very strong idea. How could you? And what you do is push it back and ask a question instead, instead of saying no. When you ask that question, as Bob will tell you in a couple of days time, that causes them to start thinking through the process and they they negated themselves all or they convince you otherwise. So the pause is very powerful. It actually makes you look wise. It's terrific. Suddenly, I work with one guy and he paused. Okay, okay, and what happened was I was and then when he spoke, oh it was wisdom. It was dripping with wisdom because he'd really thought through the entire problem. So you better be listening to that point. Plus, of course, when you stop and pause for a moment instead of talking, people what more, what happened? I'll pay attention. So just use it. Use it in your presentations, use it in meetings, use it with your kids. Teach your kids to pause. Just say stop and think. Stop and think, stop, think, breathe, because then the oxygen can come in. If you, if you teach...

...them to breathe deep into the belly and blow downwards through the mouth, they will reduce the courts of this. They will reduce their stress. When we reduce US stress, we think best our well, just in this conversation I've been applying things. Did you just said, I'm right and I feel better. So there you go. In what thirty minutes that results? Yeah, why? Because it's the way our brain is built. It's the architecture of brain and consciousness and how all the we're not going to get into those philosophical points, but still this is very powerful. Thankful much. Thank you so much. This is amazing. I learned so much today and I have your client today and I got results. So there you go. Now what last question? What is the most important piece of information? Anybody who watches this, who's watching now, our watches later, for the eternity existence. Should they walk away with today? One piece of information. That's critical piece of information. The one critical pieces of Vounty check number two is Paus. Okay, that's powering. What you do is you you allow yourself that moment. You allow your brain to catch up. People are well, the people's brains to catch up, to think about whats being said, because this is always leadership is about relationship, it's about communication, and so when we're doing that, we need to stop them think and use our small brains, because that is what sex. Good leaders are part those that think things through and communicate clearly, have stopped a moment. They pulls the plans they prepared and what they then, who is say? Then look as if they seemed US look natural. There is no such thing as natural leadership. It's all and learned behavior, and the best leaders in the world, I guarantee. You Watch their interviews, you watch them live. Tate pulls, of course, apart. Right. They use the thinking slow more than the thinking fast. Right and well, RIS, this has been amazing. Please visit leadership at Advantagecom so you can get in touch with this amazing man who's talking about these amazing tips. So, so in touch with him. On the description of this video, I put your linkedin and your youtube right. So thank you so much. You can share this freely, John, with your community as well. And well, thank you so so much for being here. It's been amazing, Kiro, thank you, robe. Thank you for being upside late in Mexico and itself, please, and talking with you today. You enjoy a very blessed and restful sleep. Oh, hopefully, hopefully, yes, and get these lights off. So my brain can start right because these these lights. Sometimes I didn't know that. That how important light is in regard to sleep cycles. It's very important. But anyways, well, thank you very much for being here as well. Have a very productive day and well, that's it, my friend. Hope to talk to you some other day. Let's keep in touch and who knows, maybe I'll visit you in Singapore. Never visit Singapore. I'm sure it's very beautiful. There is very beautifully. We look forward to my friend. Thanks are a bye. Thank you everybody for being here today. We had John Kenworthy on Thursday. We have...

Bob t with leading with questions. Thank you very much being here tonight. For those who caught the show, and as always, this was leadership link, first episode in English, episode five. SEE IT NEXT TIME.

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