AdvantEdge Joy@Work Podcast:
AdvantEdge Joy@Work Podcast:

Episode · 2 weeks ago

How to Enjoy a Happy and Successful Year Ahead

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Double Blessings to you this new year.

Ask what they want from the coming new year and most people are seeking to be happy and successful in the year ahead. We see the new year as a fresh start where we can put the past behind us and move ahead.

Sadly, most people never achieve happiness or success and, in large part, that’s down to the way we set goals and commit to new year’s “resolutions”.

The problem is a lack of motivation and a lack of balanced prioritisation.

Resolutions tend to be negative shifts of behaviour that we “should” do for our own good. Things like: get fit, lose weight, quit smoking, quit drinking, be kind to everyone, stop complaining. All things that our flesh just screams to keep on doing because we don’t like change - or at least our brain does not like change - and your brain was getting something it liked from the “bad habits” of last year. Your brain would rather “do nothing” than “do something, anything, taxing”.

And those new goals, we try but they tend to throw us even more off balance than we were already. What we need is to re-consider goals across all key aspects of our life. And those goals need to have an embedded, motivational purpose - our reason for achieving them, our “why” I should put in all this effort. Without which, our brain quickly defaults back to its preference of “do nothing”!

We need a crystal clear, compelling picture of our future and what success looks like in each of the key areas of life. What is called a “Command Intent” and we need one or more for each of our five key life engines.

Listen, watch or read the podcast now - it’s in a new format which we hope you like. It’ll be 15 minutes very well spent.

I hope that you enjoyed a joyful festive season and you are ready for the excellent challenges that 2022 may bring.

Be blessed - and remember - let us know what you think of the new podcast format.

Welcome to the joy at work podcast. Regular listeners will immediately notice a change in format for this podcast. Wehope that you like it and we'd love to hear your thought on this inyour comments. I'm Alex and I am joined by our resident Behavioral Ner,scientist and expert leadership coach, Dr John Kenworthy. Alex is Great Away withme today. Today we're discussing why you need a rocket ship for your life. Welcome to your joy at work podcast, Dr John. First off, Ithink we need to understand what is a rocket ship for life. Therocket ship for life I'm about because I used to suffer from a major problem. Basically, I was easily distracted. Teachers could rarely get lettle and keepmy attention. Let's start a new project, only to get quickly bold frustrated andI moved on to the next shiny object. If ADHD had been popularback then, perhaps I could have got myself and medicated for it. Andit wasn't. Because I like goals much...

...that I wanted to achieve in mycareer, but for some strange reason I was always looking for something I couldn'tget all keep focused long enough to stick with it and finish. The bigissue returned out was not lack of clear goals, not an inability to focus, it was that they were gaps in what I was trying to achieve.There was no balance. That's what many a badly described as work life balance, but what I prefer to call work life integration. It's where you identifyyour desired intent in the five key areas of your life as the drivers ofthe things that you do every day, steered by your values and are linedto your overall purpose or mission in life.

If you ask most people what theywant from life, I'll tell you a variation of to be happy andsuccessful, what the Bible calls good success in Joshua one, verse eight.Some people think that more money will make them happy. The problem is moneyas a great servant, but allows you master. And so what if youachieve great success at work, if you spend all your time at work andneglect your family and health? As I mentioned, we have identified five keyareas in life that, when attended to folly, will bring you real happinessand success as you fulfill them. What are the five key areas? Thesefive key areas are like the engines of a rocket ship that you ride towardsyour life, purpose, your values. Other way, you steer and choosewhich paths you are following, and the fiber areas that we've uncovered through ourresearch. Our number one family and relationships,...

...and but two health and wellbeing.Thirdly, in the middle, spiritual fulfillment, fourthly, your personal developmentand fifthly, your work and career. As you can imagine, like mostpeople, I'd paid a great attention to working career and I found it increasinglydifficult to keep steering straight. I was working eighty plus hours every week.This was in the days when I was in the hotel and restaurant business.No brakes, rarely a weekend off and scant holidays, and I've gotten awaywith it healthwise for a good few years. But it really shouldn't have surprised mewhen my body rebelled and finally got me to pay a lot more attentionto my health and well being, when my heart throw a hissy fit intwo thousand and fourteen. Wow, that...

...must have been life changing. Yes, it was. See, when you neglect an engine, it's always goingto be much more difficult to keep going towards your purpose and very easy toget blown off course it's why your life and work are off balance, notintegrated. Do most people have this are planned out? Not at all.In the many years I've been coaching, fewer than twenty percent have anything remotelyresembling balance, and they've usually been coached before or I've had their own healthor personal crisis. There's many a successful person in the board room whose familylife is in shambles. Why these five areas? And is one more importantthan the others? Well, as you think about each one, you'll realizethat if you stop feeding one of these areas and consider the repercussions in yourown life, if you show no ambition...

...in your work, your career stagnates, just becomes a routine you can do with your eyes shut. Your brainbecomes inactive and you are simply marking time until one day you retire. Andthen well, well, let's say you don't bother with personal development after schoolor college and you learn nothing new. Now everything in your life stagnates.Your brain is bored because it's a learning machine, and when your brain isbored you get depressed because you lack Sarahtonin and dopening, and then you'll optout of everything else life has to, for that's not good, not atall. If you neglect your spiritual man and there's a big hole in yourlife and emptiness that you cannot quite put your finger on, you'll triumphillip withall sorts of other things, but nothing...

...ever seems to satisfy. Neglect yourhealth and wellbeing and your body will one day, sooner or later, quitentirely. Your brain tried to keep you not dead. It's job, butsomehow you resisted that urge until it too gave up fighting. You neglect yourfamily and or your relationships, and you will soon be alone. And humansare social animals. You have an innate desire to belong to a tribe,to matter to others. So you need our five of these engines. Yes, we all need all of these engines, and just like a vehicle engine,you need to keep it maintained properly. The trouble is everyone is fundamentally lazy, or about fairer to say that...

...your brain is fundamentally lazy. Ifthere is a do nothing option, your brain will take it, because doanything requires effort, which burns scarce energy. So if you do not deliberately attendto each of your engines, your brain will neglect them until something breaks. Absolutely right, Alex, if we're going to burn fuel in these fiveareas, you're saying that we need to have a reason for doing so.Each engine need to drive or motivation for the brain to switch from its defaultdo nothing, to do something to get whatever we intend to get. Sowe need to tell our brain specifically what we intend to get. Yes,once we do something, then your brain is prepared to spend that precious fuelin that area. Where not s at a simple goal or a smart goal? Goals are great, and smart goals...

...are even better. Howe. Commandintent is usually more suited to changing situations, which is real life, and,very importantly, it has an embedded purpose. This is what turns yourbrain on to motivation. I've written a lot on why goal setting matters andwill share a link in the Jow notes. Okay, establishing command intent in eacharea really matters, then absolutely no one climbs a boarder space rocket readyto launch into the heavens and then asks son, where should we go today? And no one replies I don't know. Let's just start and we'll go fromthat. Know, every time there is a clear command intent for themission, and each and every engine has a very precise role in achieving thatintent to help the rocket ship and crew...

...fulfill the mission. What's the differencebetween purpose, mission and intent? We don't have time here today to delveinto a difference between purpose and intent. Suffice to say for now your purposeis why you were born. It's your overall mission. Your command, intenseplural, are what you achieve along the journey to fulfill your purpose or missionin life. Let's get practical. How do you establish command intent in eachof these five areas of your life? If you ask most people what theyintend to achieve in their career, their career goal, for example, andyou'll probably get a very vague answer and money, position, happiness level andmaybe a job tile. Honestly, that's about as useful as telling a blindfootballer that the goal is at the end of the pitch. which end youask? And many other questions besides,...

...not least is how will you knowwhen you have scored a goal? So we've got a change the question.Establishing a command intent for anything is simply a case of answering the question.What does success look like? What a success look like? Yes, andand when I use the word look, I mean all of your senses.Look, feel, taste, smell, sound and be as specific as youcan be. And when we are asking what does it look like, wemean literally, what do will you see with your eyes, in reality andin as much rich detail as you can? And you repeat that with feel,emotions and touch, smell, which...

...is the most evocative and immediate ofyour senses, taste and sound. And if it's not evident in your answers, how will you know that you've achieved it? How will you measure yourachievements? You will ask what will you win or gain, and what willyou lose when you have achieved it? This bit is the embedded purpose.And lastly, one more question here, by when the needs some time here, when this is full of very riches sensory descriptions, you will have acaptivating picture of your future. And you do this for our five areas ofyour life. You'll find it helpful and motivational to have a very clear commandintent in all five areas of your life,...

...your work and career, your familyand relationships, your spiritual life, your health and your personal development,making sure that they support each other and our congruent. Miss One area andyou are risk struggling to steer your life purposefully forward. He said. Bywhen is this just for the long term future? It's best to have commandin tense for the short, medium and long term. Most of my clientsfind it helpful to establish these command intents in three time frames, Short,medium and long term futures. Whatever is short, medium or long term foryou. A little aside here on future time frames. Most teams seem tostruggle with a long term time frame of...

...ten years as the most young adults. As we get older, it becomes easier to imagine further into the futurewhat's next. If you lead a team, then you are responsible for identifying aworthy and compelling vision and articulating it to the team. People continually needto be shown the team's compass clearly and creatively so that their actions are alignedand they stay motivated with a captivating picture of their future in their book madeto stick. Chip and Dan Heath share help from the unit in charge ofmilitary simulations for NATO, the Combat Maneuver Training Center, who recommend the officersarrived at the commander's intent by asking themselves this question, and I've just inthis for use with personal intense if I...

...do nothing else tomorrow, I mustdot dot dot so that dot dot dot answer this question in each of yourfive key life areas and every day you will have that often elusive, almostmythical balance. Where can you go to learn more? As An advantage coachingclient, will help you fine tune your rocket ship for life so that youhave a crystal clear, captivating picture of the future and what your success ineach of these areas of your life look like, and will guide you onthat path that will equip and empower you to achieve them. You can applyfor your complimentary advantage discovery session today and will discuss it, and that's withoutany obligation other than to join your scheduled...

...discovery session without obligation. Thanks John, for your insights into the rocket ship for life and how we can achievework life integration by establishing a captivating picture of our own future in the fivekey areas of our life so that our engines run well and we are motivatedto achieve our own success. Thanks and being greatly blessed. We hope thatyou've enjoyed this joy at work podcast and this new format with me, Alex, asking our resident behavioral neuroscientist and expert leadership coach, Doctor John Kenworthy,to guide us in developing our leadership so that we can have joy at workand our team is united and trust and collaboration. Do you remember to letus know what you think of the new format and, if you haven't doneso, subscribe and read us on your favorite podcast platform, and do rememberto tell others who you think will find this podcast useful for their own leadershipdevelopment.

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